“THAT” guy

My good friend Laura and I have inside jokes.  Our talk has recently revolved around extreme baby hunger (I will just leave as to who does anonymous…it’s NOT me) and texing back and forth: “I NEED A MAAAAAN!”  So this post is reminiscent of those times where I wonder “is my soul mate really out there, or has he already died?” The only solace I find is making such lists and blog rants. Enjoy Laura! This is for YOU.

**ahem…** clearing throat

Bookish artistic type in the black, thick rimmed glasses, please!

Dare I say there are men wandering the planet that care more about the history channel than ESPN?  And also be heterosexual? I submit that there ARE! And I will find that man.  There’s something insanely sexy about a guy who says: “hey, did you know that the Lion King is essentially the Shakespearean play Hamlet but with really big cats?” What can I say? I like a guy who knows facts,history, trivial pop culture, infused with humor and wit. Oh and music men! My heart once melted and turned into a puddle on my lap when I heard a guy sing: “Baby it’s cold outside” strumming his ukulele and singing the female solo in a comical falsetto.  The way to my heart is through a little song, dance and smarts.

Its really all in the little things:

There is something endearing about a guy who holds on to grade school memorabilia, sticks to his  little traditions and rituals, and takes great joy and excitement in recalling memorable events.  I can also foresee this quality to be much desired once we have children. I can just see him now, excitedly running around the living room Christmas morning,camcorder in hand  ooohing and ahhing over the treasures in the kiddos stockings as if  he saw them for the very first time.

He gives me side aches:

I need more laughter in my life. I know I want to live with and grow old with someone who makes me snort, pee my pants, and squirt beverages out of my nose for my entire life. I want the randomness and Silly, completely made up games as we are grocery shopping. Fun, stay-at-home nights where we’d youtube demonic baby laughs, horrible eighties commericals, and unreal Japanese game shows.  I definitely need someone to accompany me with one of my favorite television pastimes: The worst of [movie & music] countdowns. Someone who will undoubtedly agree that “Turn on Your Heart Light”, “Key Largo”, and “Tonight I celebrate my Love For You” are some of the “awesomely worst love songs” ever made, as we cackle at the music videos which were responsible for such placement.

Who am I kidding? All my life up until I turned 15 I dreamed of being Mrs. Han Solo.

But I realize I need a man who without hesitation will tell me how much he loves me back, instead of just saying: “I know”.

I think I just found a new blog post title for next week. “Celebrity man crushes I once had and still harbor”

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Hobbies I meant to adopt last week:

find the world’s best lemonade

join a punk band and be the chick on the synthesizer

fall in love with a guy with a Jewish looking nose who makes me laugh

cradle a Westie puppy

perfect the art of sarcasm

learn to play chess

move to Minneapolis

expand my creativity

Experience a freak accident (safely) and be a guest on Regis and Kelly

expand my perspicacity

Read the entire dictionary and throw in clever, astute vocabulary into casual conversations

Obtain a cloak of invisibility

Break  addiction to Law & Order: SVU so my dreams may be more pleasant.

 

♥——-♥——-♥——-♥——–♥

 

Instead I had a root beer float every night this past week,  submitted a bajillion applications for employment and watched far too many re runs of Matlock and I Love Lucy.